Bayou Gator Tour

Cajun land

During a trip to New Orleans, Louisiana I made the necessary bus ride out to the swamps for a bayou gator tour. This was the number one item on my itinerary; I’ve loved and feared gators ever since I was a child. One time while in South Dakota my family saw a show where a guy wrestled an alligator in an enclosure. I couldn’t wait to see what they were like in the wild.

I went with my friends Ronda and George. Along with a bunch of other tourists we loaded on to a pontoon boat and met our guide. He was big, bearded, and Cajun. Of course, the first thing he did was give us the low down about Cajun vs Creole. I won’t offend anyone by trying to explain it here, apart from saying it has a lot to do with city vs country and food.

We motored out into the bayou, the waters of which were a muddy brown. Our guide pointed out remnants of Hurricane Katrina, such as broken homes and wrecked concrete. In addition, he shared some backstory about the politics of the area and showed us the rusting bridges. Life ain’t easy on the bayou, on top of being surrounded by gators.

The one-armed bandit

The bearded Cajun guide told one funny story about a man called the “one armed bandit”. Prior to receiving this nickname, he was a bit of a hooligan, frequently causing trouble. He was most notorious for breaking into people’s homes and stealing their stuff.

To impress his friends, one day this fellow jumped off a dock into the bayou to swim with a notorious alligator that was passing by. The alligator was a long-time resident of the bayou and commanded everyone’s respect. He was huge, the alpha male of the area.

To no one’s surprise but the bandit’s, the alligator chewed off one of his arms; hence one-arm. This event didn’t stop his thieving ways, much to the disappointment of the community. Even with just one arm he still tried to steal things. Eventually he was easily caught one-handed while trying to make off with a television.

Gators and Hogs

Our guide shared another tale about one of his fellow coworkers who got a bit too adventurous on a certain bayou gator tour. This man took his boat into a backwater where his guests could see both an alligator as well as a family of wild pigs on the shore. Instead of just sitting and watching, he decided to put on a show.

Bit by bit he lured one of the pigs into the water with marshmallows. Each marshmallow brought the pig closer to the alligator, until, well you can guess what happened. Or you can just watch it here and have an internal debate about the morality of luring pigs to their death. Then, your mind will probably wander to the morality of eating pigs, and meat, in general. Warning though, it’s pretty graphic. The guy that did this got fired.

We also saw both hogs and alligators, although there wasn’t any drama. Hogs are apparently devastating on the bayou, rooting up and eating just about anything they can get their snout on. As for the gators, they are feared but beloved. They also love hot dogs, which was our way of luring them to the boat for photo opportunities.

Gators can jump

The life of a gator is no wild hog picnic. One of the alligators which came up to our boat had a large chunk of its bottom mouth missing. Obviously, this made it a challenge to eat. The guide informed us that this was likely from a duel with a fellow gator. Like any wild animal, gators are territorial and will fight each other.

In addition to being territorial they are athletic. This was on display during the bayou gator tour. We all got the chance to stick a hot dog at the end of a stick and hold it over the edge of the boat. The gators would then swim over and leap out of the water, chomping the hot dogs down their gullets. Here’s some more info about gator prowess. A gator’s bite averages around 2000 psi. A human bite is roughly 160 psi.

This was one water voyage where I did not swim. Heck, I didn’t even reach down and touch the water. That just goes to show the respect that alligator’s command. At the end of the trip our guide pointed out one last gator, floating out in the deep part of the bayou. That one, apparently, was too big to approach. Even the big, bearded Cajun guide has a healthy fear for gators.